I always feel adrift.

I hate questions of the future. It gives me anxiety. I don’t have an answer for it.

People say the more you grow older the more you figure out the answers to our questions. Ironically, the more you understand about reality the more you are clueless about it.

I have so many goals in life. Goals for my health, education, work, family. But on any given day if you ask me where do you see yourself in the future I go blank. I think it goes with the fact that I make great plans but when it comes to actually working on it I procrastinate.

But there has been on goal that has been in my life since I was old enough. To be a better Christian. I believe that if I keep that as a consistent goal in my life everything else will fall into place. Jesus gave me an example on how to be a good human despite the evils in the world. I hope that one day I can say that I am a better person than I was yesterday. If I can commit to the person who loves me the most, it makes sense that committing to the rest is going to be easy.

I hope that I learn to make Him my focus in life. I hope that He becomes my direction. And that every step I take in my life is towards His plan for my life.