Tag: change

Home is where the Heart is…

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What do you love about where you live?

When I think about the places I have lived nothing specific comes to mind. If someone want to ask me why I chose to stay in certain place, I really don’t have an answer to it.

It could be because I have never really given it a second thought. In most of the instances I ended up staying in a place because of the stage of life I was in.

As a child, I stayed with my parents, so where their jobs took them. We ended up setting up in those places. When I got older, I chose a place where I wanted to pursue my higher education and when I got even more older, I chose the place, but I got a job.

The one thing that I do know is that I might have chosen those places because of an underlying reason. However, overtime, I made my home in those places. I went out, explore things that I like found reasons to feel happy in the place that I was.

So, in short, what I love about the place where I live, is that I have my home there.

Happy

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What positive emotion do you feel most often?

Saying that happiness is the most often emotion or more like positive emotion that I have may seem like a lie.

As a person who is living with depression, most days, I wake up weak and tired and just frustrated with life. However, when I see my mother gaze fondly at her grandchildren in that moment, I am happy. She had to leave my sister and me back in our hometown with our grandparents when we were babies because she couldn’t afford to take us along with her. She missed our childhood, but I’m glad that she gets to see the childhood of her grandchildren at least.

When I see the joy in my sisters eye, every time she shares with us, her achievement, her individual achievement, it makes me happy. She has gone through a lot to finally find something of a room and that she found it. It makes me feel like she can start to be happy for herself.

When I see my father bring back a fruit or a vegetable from his home garden and I see the pride with which she brings it. It makes me happy. He loves agriculture, and when he was healthier and younger, I think she dreamt of going back home and having a land filled with beautiful trees and plants. He gave it up because he had to provide for his family. It may not be a lot, but the small area in which he has planted the few household vegetables and fruits is cherished as a testament to his passion.

I think no matter how sad I am as long as my family is happy. That is a good memory for me. That is happiness for me. I wish I could be the reason for that happiness. Just like they are for me.

So to conclude, I stop focusing on myself, the emotion that I feel the most is happy.

Any Sort of Art

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Which activities make you lose track of time?

I wouldn’t consider myself an artist, but I would consider myself as a person who loves art.

Whenever I am stressed out or just need a break from reality, I turn to artwork. I know that there are people better than me and who are much more advanced in terms of technique. And for a long time, I hesitated to make my own art out of fear that people will ridicule me.

But now I enjoy any form of art, I can sit making a painting or drawing up a new anime character and I would never realise the passage of time. Just this last weekend, I spent 14 hours on drawing my favourite Pokémon characters and after the whole ordeal I wasn’t exhausted but rather refreshed.

I have come to realise that art actually helps me calm down. It makes my mind stop with its multitasking and over brooding and just focus at the piece of paper in front of me.

Some would say that it’s a waste of time, but for me, it centres me. It is a form of therapy that I never thought I needed. Now that I have realised the value of it, I ain’t ever letting it go.

A Night to Remember

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If you could host a dinner and anyone you invite was sure to come, who would you invite?

If I could invite anyone to dinner….

On first thought, I think maybe I would want to invite my favourite artist or writer or celebrity. Then I think again I don’t have anything common with them. I might not like them.

Maybe I wanna invite my old friends or teachers, but then again what if they have changed from the last time I met them. Or what if they see changing me which they don’t like?

I think to myself, maybe I am being a little shallow, and I should probably just invite my family, the people I love. But I have dinner with them every day.

But then, I give it a little more thought. Do I really want to have dinner with someone specifically? No, not really. Just imagine the work it would take to make the dinner, set the table, make pleasant conversation, and the cleanup after!

If I were to ever have the opportunity to invite someone, and they could not refuse. I probably would want to go to an art gallery or a museum. This way I would enjoy the time and I would not have to stress about making the evening perfect.

Me

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What do you think gets better with age?

A little too cliche? I could say something like wine or cheese or any other thing. However, I’ve come to realise that the best version of me is always the tomorrow version of me.

Throughout my life, I’ve always had someone trying to advise me or teach me what is right and wrong. They do it to protect me to not make the same mistakes they did, but I have come to realise that my mistakes are the ones that teach me the best.

I have fallen into the most worst situations after not listening to the advice of my elders and notice that I end up, making the same mistakes over and over again. Till I finally draw the line myself,

I have learnt to work hard, even when everything feels like it’s crashing down on me. I have learnt not to hurt others just because I am hurting, I learnt that some days are filled with hopelessness, but you still keep fighting for that one day or one moment of happiness.

I think time has taught me to accept and move on. It has taught me that today is wrong, may just be tomorrow’s right.

I am grateful for what the years have taught me, and I am grateful for the years I may have left. I hope that everyone hold on and get to see the better version of themselves like I have.

Draw

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There are many things that I do to unwind.

Sometimes I like to draw up a warm bath and read a nice book. Or maybe just order in food and put on a K-drama on TV and binge watch till I fall asleep.

But the best thing I like to do is to draw. I love any sort of art. It disconnects me from the world and makes me just happy.

How do you unwind after a demanding day?

Kaleidoscope of Destinies

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If you were to ask me yesterday I would say settled, owning a small business, maybe a house and car.

However, today I am philosophical, as I speculated on the prompt the answer that came to my mind was “How the hell would I know?”. All I see when I think 10 years ahead is uncertainty.

I feel that every situation in my life makes me make a choice and that in turn changes the course of my life. On any other day I would stress out and want to fight harder to get back on track. But today, I am choosing to keep making progress it may not be what I initially planned but that is okay.

I may not achieve things by the initial timeline I set for them, but, as long as I keep trying there is a hope that I will get there eventually.

Daily writing prompt
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
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Letting Go!

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I am not a person who can easily forget things. Worse than that, I keep reliving the mostly horrible moments of my life over and over again.

I always thought that I am not good at moving on from things when it comes to others. Carrying the weight of all that pain and hurt was just beyond anything I have ever known. I had to break down completely after which I realized that letting go was the only option I had to move on.

And my word! The first time I just let myself be was just life altering! I still have a problem with letting go. But I have learnt to let go of little things. There are always going to be something that I cannot control and that is okay!

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Besides having absolute control over your destiny is overrated! 🙂

Daily writing prompt
Describe one positive change you have made in your life.
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Panda Caretaker!

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I know I could probably say something more meaningful. But from the numerous videos seen online being a panda caretaker seem fun!

I know every job has its down side but the upside seems too good to focus on the bad. I mean just look at the videos. I mean seeing at how clumsy they are it is truly a wonder how they survive.

I think anyone who love to hug them! They are so cute and if you think its just when they are small, you are mistaken because even full grown they can be a menance!

Daily writing prompt
What job would you do for free?
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Adapt or Accept

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I think the time before COVID everyone was just running around. We all were just focused on the next race without ever thinking about the end goal. COVID slowed us down a little. At one point of time everything was just too overwhelming.

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I think for that one part it worked to my favor. I liked staying indoors turned into somewhat like a vampire. I enjoyed the smaller crowds, the fact that you could stay at home in the comfort of your PJs and spend time just talking with family and friends.

I am not sure if I have adapted that well, I think I mostly just accepted the change out of the uncertainty that it posed. I think with everything there is always a good and a bad. But I sincerely hope that no one ever has to face such a fear in life again.

Daily writing prompt
How have you adapted to the changes brought on by the Covid-19 pandemic?
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