Day 23: Being Busy

I literally had nothing to do today. I woke up at 6 am but then stayed curled on by bed till 8 am. When I finally rose from my bed I realized I have nothing to do. No Monday morning weekly planning. No calls. No meetings. No pings from work. It was weird.

I thought to myself since I have sometime I would best try organizing my stationery. My biggest challenge is my washi tape collection. Its stored in boxes that are not clear. The fact that I cannot see them and have to rummage through the box to find one that I want always deterred me. At the end, I have a boxes that gather up dust.

So today, I started reorganizing my collections. By color, by width, by pattern. I have got through about half of it today. Tomorrow the real work starts. Hopefully I can get it done by tomorrow and then have a relaxing Christmas Eve.

Excited for tomorrow. I hope that I finally start using my washi for the art spreads and not have them forgotten in the back of my storage.

Day 22: Joy of Small Wins

For the first time in a year I am finally sleeping in my room. I had to shift to my sister’s room. Her room has an attached bathroom. I could not walk across the hall every time I needed to use the washroom. I used to often cry because of it.

Today I slept in my own bed. Although there was a little pain, I still could make it across the hall without falling. It felt redeeming.

Other highlights of the day, I made lunch today. I once again took my time. It felt good. I also wanted to bake some bread but I was exhausted by the cooking. As such, I choose to stop for the day. Small successes are still a success, I remind myself and then everything feels like a blessing.

Other than that I did not do much else. The weather is so cold all I want to do is curl up under my blanket and sleep.

Everchanging View

Daily writing prompt
How have your political views changed over time?

Viewpoints always change. Atleast this holds true for me.

Politics was something I never paid much heed to. It was just too complicated. I believed in what I saw and heard and did not question anything.

But as I matured, those assumptions were challenged multiple times. I started noticing that nothing was ever as it seemed. The deeper I looked into issues, the more contradictions I discovered. Ideas I once thought were unquestionably right were quite different than what they seemed.

My opinions began to sway, sometimes leaning one way, then shifting to another. At first, I saw this as indecision. But over time, I realized that my understanding of the situations were getting better.

Changing viewpoints isn’t a weakness. It means you’re willing to try to understand the perplexing circumstances and admit when you need to change your perspective. My core principles like fairness and accountability have never changed but maybe the paths to it are open to debate.

In the end, I’ve learned that confidence doesn’t come from being stubborn. Rather, it comes from asking questions and understanding different aspects of the same situation.

None till Date

Daily writing prompt
What sacrifices have you made in life?

This prompt is something you really need to think about. My instant thought when I think of sacrifice is all the things that I had to give up in life. When I had to walk past a toy that I really wanted because it was too costly. When I had to give away my gifts because my cousins had lesser. When I had to give up my dream degree because my parents didn’t want to be alone.

But now that I have taken a minute, they were never sacrifices. They were choices that I had to make with age. After you grow up these childhood “sacrifices” you realize were just things that you had to let go. It was about choosing between two things. I was not giving up anything for anybody.

Sacrifice is when my parents gave up on pursuing their education to save up for my future education. They gave up their health because check ups “costly” or “not required”. The real reason was they wanted to provide for the family even if it meant that they become sicker. Even when they were tired and exhausted just one whine from me and they would carry me in their arms.

Sacrifice is what my sister did. When we were children, she always gave the bigger piece of the chocolate she loved. She is immensely talented. However, when there was a school program she never gave her name because my parents could not afford paying for us both. She didn’t pursue her career dream because that meant that I could not afford to have a dream.

But the biggest sacrifice of all is what Jesus did for me. We do not like when we get punishment when we do something wrong. He was punished when he did nothing wrong. He took that punishment without a word of protest so I could be guilt free. He gave His life for me so I could have life. When sins closed my way to God He broke down the walls to pull me closer.

Sacrifices are those that can never be paid back. All I can hope is be worthy of the sacrifices made for me. Maybe one day when I does come to me I also am willing to sacrifice for the people I love.

My Cross Pendant

Daily writing prompt
What’s the oldest things you’re wearing today?

I have a lot older things but they are safely kept in my box of memories.

The only item I do wear everyday is my cross pendant that my mother gifted me. Over the years I have changed the chains multiple times. However, I always add my pendant to the new chain.

I love wearing the cross its the first thing my mother bought for me after a long time. Not as a birthday gift or a gift for an occasion. She just randomly came up to me one day and gave me the box with the pendant. It isn’t anything fancy or over the top. But the worth it holds for me is far beyond words.

My cross is the constant reminder that I am never alone. If ever I am stressed I automatically touch the cross and I remember that God is always with me. I hope that I can keep the cross with me as long as I am alive and maybe pass it along as a heirloom.

Pilot

Daily writing prompt
What’s a job you would like to do for just one day?

Being a Pilot was a dream that I had when I was a kid.

I used to keep looking at the skies fascinated by how humans fly. I have traveled a lot by plane, but being the person at the controls… now that is something else.

Of course, dreaming is one thing but consciously working towards it is another ball game all together. It takes a lot of dedication, discipline and time to touch the skies.

Over time my dreams have changed but if I could have the skills and the qualification I would love to fly a plane. Just one day would be enough!