Day 5: Feeling Bored

It’s just been the fifth day of me, trying to maintain a consistent habit of writing a blog. I am already feeling like just giving up.

More than writing a blog consistently, I wanted to keep this blog as a way to keep myself accountable to the changes that I want to make in my life. I keep stalling on things such as waking up early and trying to exercise or even meditate for that matter.

The worst part of it all is that I still have not started reading my bible every day. I really want to be closer to God before I close my eyes not for the fear of hell or death. I just feel guilty that He was the one person that showed me consistent love, and I haven’t even begun to start loving him back.

Starting tomorrow I am going to make that conscious effort to read the bible and prayer before I start my day. Hopefully one day it becomes a necessity rather than a forced habit.

The items that broke my bank

I am a calculated impulsive buyer. I do not know if that makes sense.

Name the most expensive personal item you’ve ever purchased (not your home or car).

It’s just that when I really want to buy something especially if the item in question is on the higher end of my usual spending bracket I take my time.

The “take my time” statement does not make sense when I call my self impulsive. Self Contradictory. To put things into perspective, the desire to buy is impulsive. As soon as I see something I like I want to buy it! The only thing that restricts me is my need for financial stability.

I end up saving for the item first. I take my time and restrict my expenses to the come up with the money to buy it. Sometimes by the time I save the money the item is out of the market and I loose the chance to buy it. However, on the other hand there are few items that I did end up buying.

My largest spends till date are: my Samsung Flip phone, my iPad and my Sony Camera. These may not be “pricey” according to some peoples standards but with my education expenses buying even these were a challenge.

Totally worth the wait and worth the cost! I think the wait to buy it made the actual purchase even more special!

Music beyond Genre

What is your favorite genre of music?

I have never had a proper understanding of the different genres of music. In fact for a long time, I did not even know that there were different genres.

My mom and sister love listening to music so I never was a stranger to it. Add to that the fact that I was 5 when I first joined the junior choir, it was a natural progression that I would develop an interest in music of my own.

My music interest started with gospel music. Closer to my teens I developed my interest in music separate from my family. Though I was not aware of it at that time I believe that I automatically divert towards “Pop” music.

Though pop music has always been my top choice that spans across languages. I have ventured into other genres like R&B, Blues, Hip-hop, rock etc..

I love exploring new music and listening to artists from different regions. Music is my daily requirement now. I listen to music when I work, when I study, when I cook even at times when I sleep. Genres have never restricted my choice or interest in music and I hope that I continue to love music in its many forms.

Undisturbed Routine

Describe your ideal week.

Ideal week?

To me, the ideal week would be when I achieve all that I set to achieve for the week.

I wanna be able to wake up every morning, pray sincerely, complete my morning exercise, prepare my meals. Then, go to work and complete all the targets for the day, share some good conversations with my friends. At the end of work, get back home and take some time to maybe do some art or something I like. And finally have a good nights rest..

I would say something is ideal when not much goes wrong. I know it is challenges that help us grow, but some days you just want to live without a care in the world.

However, as much as I like a carefree life, I know that I would definitely get bored of it soon. But maybe once in awhile, little break wouldn’t harm anyone.

Sleep.. Read.. Eat..

How do you relax?

When somebody talks about relaxation, the first thing that comes to my mind is sleep.

I love sleeping. After working 12 hours days, my comfortable bed and warm blanket seems like heaven. It is my dream to sleep for 15 hours at a stretch, but somehow I always wake up at an eight hour mark.

The second most relaxing thing for me is a nice novel and a hot cup of hot chocolate. Reading always relaxes my mind. It takes me to places that can literally only be imagined. It’s somehow helps me forget all the worries of this world. The book literally transports me to a place in time where everything seems magical.

And of course, though I am not a foodie, good comfort food, really relaxes my soul. when I eat food that is prepared by either mom, dad or my elder sister for that moment, everything seems right with the world. It doesn’t matter that I had people yell at me throughout the day all that the frustration at work reached to a point where I just wanted to bang my head against the wall. Home made food always makes me feel better.

And in summation, sleep for the body, read for the mind and eat for the soul. The perfect recipe for relaxing day.

I want them all

If you had to give up one word that you use regularly, what would it be?

I think this would be a very difficult choice for me or rather not a choice for me.

I like to use words and I use a plethora of it. The words that I don’t use that often may not hold much significance to me. However, if there are words that I use regularly, which of course I am not particularly aware of there is no way that I would want to give up on any of it.

If I am using a word regularly, it means that I am comfortable with that word, and why would I do something that makes me uncomfortable?

So there you go, I ain’t giving up on any word.

Distant travels

Share a story about the furthest you’ve ever traveled from home.

Unlike the rest of my family, I have had an opportunity or more like multiple opportunities to travel abroad. And shocking. Most of this travels were not with my family,

Every trip was to a new place and on every trip, I learnt something new. I really hope that one day I can say that I have travelled to more than 20 countries at least.

So far the farthest trip, I have taken was a 20 hour flight on account of my work. I did sleep through most or more like 90% of the flight duration. However, the experience that I had in each place that I touched down at have been added to my cherished memories.

Innocence

What brings a tear of joy to your eye?

Who doesn’t smile seeing a baby making funny faces. The instant happiness you get seeing a child opening a gift. A little girl baking for her parents birthday and ending up as a flour covered doll. A child dancing in the rain without a care of the world.

For me, seeing the innocence in and other humans, bring an automatic smile to my face.

The world today is a cruel place. There is no place for innocence anymore.

Everyone is forced to grow up soon. Everywhere you turn it feels like the world is just filled with hatred and evil. We no longer see the good in the world. All we do is live in the constant fear of being harmed

Seeing someone being able to appreciate and enjoy the little joy of life brings a tear to my eyes. I wish that the world was little bit nicer so that we could hold onto our innocence, a little bit longer.

Every memory that we make would not be tainted with the fear of what could go wrong, but with just pure emotions of happiness. I wish we could be children again without the fear that knowing this world brings.

I feel Unpretty

How would you describe yourself to someone who can’t see you?

I think anyone who has to answer this question would be critical about themselves.

If I were to describe myself, I would say that I have a round chubby face. I have thin but long hair, tiny eyes and a tiny nose. And that’s about it. I have no other words to describe myself.

It takes a lot of confidence to call oneself pretty. The world is a very cruel place. It keeps changing its opinion on what is beautiful and we humans keep running to meet those standards.

I recently saw a video in which an artist was drawing a picture based of two descriptions: one, a stranger describing the person’s appearance and the other when the person described themself. It was shocking to see how beautiful that individual looked in the stranger’s eyes when compared to how the individual perceived themselves.

Content

How are you feeling right now?

If this was the prompt for yesterday, I probably would answer it as sleepy and irritated.

Today, however, I am happy or more like content. I might have a lot of things in my life that is not going right but despite at all, I was able to laugh with my friends and family. I watched my favourite TV series, I took some time out to do some art work, and it was amazing.

Today I took a little dry and life gave me and enjoyed the moment. I kept the thoughts of my future and all the worries that come with it at the back of my mind. I embraced the calmness of my mind and added to my happy memories.